My Religion Defined In A Sentence by Kolleen Arnold

 
 
 
 
I, Kolleen Arnold, can’t upload this these words, so you have my permission to post on your blog:

My religion defined in a sentence:
November 8, 2008 at 2:49pm

4-13-02

My religion defined in a sentence: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. I choose to not believe in God. I simply can not and do not adore or worship a god that allows catastrophes, whether it be a virus, environmental or man-made to happen over and over. It’s calls history, and repeats itself over and over. I choose to be a pragmatic. I look at a situation I look at the facts, possibilities, chances, reality and history at hand.

Why would I worship a God that allow:

Seizures & headaches.
Let a murderer live, but my great-grandmother die in the same week.
Memories so secret I can’t even write them down anywhere except in my mind
Me to raped twice, one almost costs my life, I really has beg for my life.
Me to have eptopic pregnancy after taking took me ten months to achieve and wanted so much. And a husband telling me he has other important stuff worries about besides a lost child.
A husband changes his mind about having children and tells me after I tell him that a new procedure is now affordable.
My tumor.
My stroke.
My tumor returns, and being inoperative.
Me seven years of hell being on an experimental medicine, RU-486, The Abortion Pill, because my tumor inoperable.
Hysterectomy because my uterus had 1 inch instead of microscopic thin, caused by RU-486.

All of these memories of these moments have a photo permanently engraved in my mind. I was 16 when my great-grandmother dies. I was walking through the living room and happened to hear that some governor had decided to stay the execution of a murder. That moment I was pissed at God that fractured my relationship beyond pardon. Yes, I had Jesus Freak stage when I was 15. I even remember the guy, Nathan, who talks through asking Jesus into my heart or soul. By doing I am going to Heaven and forgiven all my sins. I am a good and honest person. Why did deserve all the rehits.

I ask you, if God were my God, I would be mad at Him all the time or ignorance deluxe, so why believe in Him? Several those miracles were people with spirit that doctors did not count on. I happened to be a spirited person. When I was recovering from a stroke, any improvement that I showed people would thank God, and pissed me off. I was working butt off in therapy. I did work out, not God. Where was God when I got the tumor and stroke? I honestly do not understand how people look the other way when catastrophes hits and then thank Him for everything… I choose to be a pragmatic.

Rather being mad at anyone, I use those moments as strength.

PS. I do not have any hard feelings for people that believe in God, as matter of fact I envy them because they have a crutch that I don’t have.Image

About 3ddieblade

A.A. - Business Management from Johnson County Community College, College graduate ~ UMKC B.S.-Acctng '90, former professional Musician, Certified Scuba Diver, Honorable Discharge from the USAF, Artist, Published Writer and Poet, and casualty of the War on Marijuana Propagators. Drowning survivor.
This entry was posted in Personal Growth, Philosophy. Bookmark the permalink.

1 Response to My Religion Defined In A Sentence by Kolleen Arnold

  1. exile says:

    “Then Isaiah is so bold as to say, ‘I have been found by those who did not seek me; I have shown myself to tkose who did not ask for me.'” Romans 10:20 (E.S.V.)

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